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606: DEBATE
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By Tom Fordyce at Wimbledon
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Serena *5-5 Dementieva
Pressure - what pressure? Demen, famed for being crumblier than a stale biscuit, serves out her game with the cold-hearted nervelessness of a brain surgeon.
Pressure - what pressure? Demen, famed for being crumblier than a stale biscuit, serves out her game with the cold-hearted nervelessness of a brain surgeon.
Serena 5-4* Dementieva
No such drama from the two-time champ. She sprints through her service game, and Demen will come out having to hold to stay alive in the set. Pressure.
No such drama from the two-time champ. She sprints through her service game, and Demen will come out having to hold to stay alive in the set. Pressure.
Serena *4-4 Dementieva
Groans of sympathy as Demen teeters at 0-40, Serena crunching three sizzling forehands back like tank-busting missiles. Virtual set points, the way Serena has been serving, and Mama Vera chunters to herself in the posh slots. Centre sits back expecting capitulation - only to be dragged forward as Demen fights back. One break point is saved as Serena goes long, another with a raking forehand and a third with a repeat of the second. When another graceful groundstroke flashes millimetres across the net and into the Williams outer reaches, the game is saved. Super pluck and spunk.
Groans of sympathy as Demen teeters at 0-40, Serena crunching three sizzling forehands back like tank-busting missiles. Virtual set points, the way Serena has been serving, and Mama Vera chunters to herself in the posh slots. Centre sits back expecting capitulation - only to be dragged forward as Demen fights back. One break point is saved as Serena goes long, another with a raking forehand and a third with a repeat of the second. When another graceful groundstroke flashes millimetres across the net and into the Williams outer reaches, the game is saved. Super pluck and spunk.
Serena 4-3* Dementieva
Fist-pump and glower combo from Serena as her first serve splutters into life. Richard Williams scratches his smoky-grey beard and jiggles his legs happily.
Fist-pump and glower combo from Serena as her first serve splutters into life. Richard Williams scratches his smoky-grey beard and jiggles his legs happily.
Serena *3-3 Dementieva
Couple of sloppy errors from Serena, who's been so untroubled all tournament so far. Demen's found a pleasing early groove and holds again with long-armed forehands. The sun slides behind a cloud, but it's still scorchio out there in the coliseum - as sultry as early period S Loren.
Couple of sloppy errors from Serena, who's been so untroubled all tournament so far. Demen's found a pleasing early groove and holds again with long-armed forehands. The sun slides behind a cloud, but it's still scorchio out there in the coliseum - as sultry as early period S Loren.
Serena 3-2* Dementieva
Richard Williams inscrutable in the VIP slots. Sweet returning from Demen, who's made it to the semis of all four Grand Slam events now. She gets to 40-30 as Serena nets a chased-down dropper but is thrashed out of the game with a monstered forehand. As the players dab faces with towels at the changeover, the TV screens how a super slo-mo of Serena grimacing with anger as racquet marmalised ball on that last point.
Richard Williams inscrutable in the VIP slots. Sweet returning from Demen, who's made it to the semis of all four Grand Slam events now. She gets to 40-30 as Serena nets a chased-down dropper but is thrashed out of the game with a monstered forehand. As the players dab faces with towels at the changeover, the TV screens how a super slo-mo of Serena grimacing with anger as racquet marmalised ball on that last point.
BBC Sport's Chris Bevan on Twitter:
"Andy will be going to the track after this session finishes for 6x400m laps. Loser of the next forfeit does 2 extra."
Serena *2-2 Dementieva
A glimpse there of Elena's mum Vera, who's also her coach. Can't imagine many things worse than being coached by your mum - the constant nagging about haircuts, the instructions to tidy up your locker, the rambling anecdotes involving distant relatives you haven't seen since you were five. Demen holds to 30 as Serena overpowers long.
A glimpse there of Elena's mum Vera, who's also her coach. Can't imagine many things worse than being coached by your mum - the constant nagging about haircuts, the instructions to tidy up your locker, the rambling anecdotes involving distant relatives you haven't seen since you were five. Demen holds to 30 as Serena overpowers long.
Serena *2-2 Dementieva
A glimpse there of Elena's mum Vera, who's also her coach. Can't imagine many things worse than being coached by your mum - the constant nagging about haircuts, the instructions to tidy up your locker, the rambling anecdotes involving distant relatives you haven't seen since you were five. Demen holds to 30 as Serena overpowers long.
A glimpse there of Elena's mum Vera, who's also her coach. Can't imagine many things worse than being coached by your mum - the constant nagging about haircuts, the instructions to tidy up your locker, the rambling anecdotes involving distant relatives you haven't seen since you were five. Demen holds to 30 as Serena overpowers long.
Serena 2-1* Dementieva
Momentum very much at Serena's back - punishing first serves, sent down with a meaty grunt, and the paper-thin Demen can only squeak in vain. In MurrayNews, I'm told tickets for Sunday's men's final are attracting bids of up to £2,500 on eBay as hopes rise of the dream Roddick-Haas showdown. However, if you were thinking of putting in a bid, a word of warning: non-debenture tickets are only valid for the person who originally bought them. Spoil-sports.
Momentum very much at Serena's back - punishing first serves, sent down with a meaty grunt, and the paper-thin Demen can only squeak in vain. In MurrayNews, I'm told tickets for Sunday's men's final are attracting bids of up to £2,500 on eBay as hopes rise of the dream Roddick-Haas showdown. However, if you were thinking of putting in a bid, a word of warning: non-debenture tickets are only valid for the person who originally bought them. Spoil-sports.
Serena *1-1 Dementieva
Serena leads 5-3 in head-to-heads between these two, but Demen's won three of the last four. Pick the omens out of that bundle. Serena marches out with brow beetling and murders a backhand down the line, stays back when the tape is calling but gets away with it and then kazaams a blistering forehand into the corner. Break back. Ouch.
Serena leads 5-3 in head-to-heads between these two, but Demen's won three of the last four. Pick the omens out of that bundle. Serena marches out with brow beetling and murders a backhand down the line, stays back when the tape is calling but gets away with it and then kazaams a blistering forehand into the corner. Break back. Ouch.
Serena 0-1* Dementieva
Ominous start for Demendevotees - ace whistled down the middle from Serena. A forehand goes long for 15-15, another finds the net. Demen then brings Serena to the net and passes her for a break point (Fordyce pauses to look smug) which is taken with a drilled backhander. Surprised and not displeased applause from the roasting patrons.
Ominous start for Demendevotees - ace whistled down the middle from Serena. A forehand goes long for 15-15, another finds the net. Demen then brings Serena to the net and passes her for a break point (Fordyce pauses to look smug) which is taken with a drilled backhander. Surprised and not displeased applause from the roasting patrons.
* denotes next server
1308: I've been asking around for ways that Elena can beat Serena. In a Family Fortunes style, the most popular answers were:
1. Bring her to the net
2. Open a Balenciaga handbag concession by the umpire's chair
3. Grow extra arms like Vishnu
1. Bring her to the net
2. Open a Balenciaga handbag concession by the umpire's chair
3. Grow extra arms like Vishnu
Centre Court Confidential 3
1302: Warm applause from a salivating Centre as Serena - unnecessarily decked out in her double-breasted rain mac - and Elena Dementieva stride on court. Just off to the side, an eye-searing glare as Tracy Austin (bright pink sun-top) and Sue Barker (cream trouser-suit) speak words of wisdom to the television cameras.
1258: Quick one before we get down to business - you couldn't manually refresh for me, could you? Otherwise you'll get me and Cheesy mixed up - a bizarre sport-loving crossbreed possibly called Fordcheese. Or Cheesedyce.
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By Caroline Cheese at Wimbledon
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1257: Right then. That's enough idle chit-chat from me. Over to Tom Fordyce for the serious business...
From Seamus, London, via text on 81111: "Second up on Court One I've noticed a mixed doubles team consisting of Black and Paes which begs the question... Where's Eyed?! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA if anyone has pointed that out before I'm going to throw a small tantrum."
Nope. That's all yours. Well done.
Nope. That's all yours. Well done.
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BBC Sport's Chris Bevan on Twitter:
"Miles M gets the water treatment. Last game has started - loser gets five minutes in the ice bath. 'That's pain and I like it,' says Andy."
1239: By the way, BBC Sport's Chris Bevan has been asked to feature on The Super Fantastic Breakfast Show - for the second time! If you're not familiar with it, it's on Radio 2000 in South Africa. I've tried to persuade Bevo, but he's gone uncharacteristically shy on us.
BBC Sport's Chris Bevan on Twitter:
"'How did I miss that?' yells Andy after putting a header into the net. Loser of this one gets cold water squirted in his face."
1230: Thanks to the good folk of
606,
Cheesy's Outside Court Golden Ticket (see 1125) has made it on to Wikipedia - and been deleted immediately. I'm happy enough that it had its 30 seconds of glory.
BBC Sport's Chris Bevan on Twitter:
"Ross Hutchins loses the first foot-tennis forfeit - he's had to squeeze into an extra small 'Game, Set, Murray' T-shirt as punishment."
1224: Wonder if that question is the new 'Who's the man in the players' box with the cowboy hat?' Luckily, I don't need a Mole to answer it. Her name is Sue and she's from Tamworth. Every year, she queues every day for Centre Court tickets. Every year, I worry that her union jack outfit goes unwashed.
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1221: Right, time to mention the women's semi-finals, which begin with Elena Dementieva v Serena Williams at 1300 BST and continue with Venus v Dinara Safina. It's Williams v Russia.
1217: Frantically trying to find a pic of the Mac doing denim. Sounds sensational. Wonder if Mac is trying to steal Boris Becker's style thunder?
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1210: Action under way an all courts except Centre and One. Top seed Kristina Mladenovic has already crushed American Sloane Stephens 6-1 6-0 in the girls' singles. Poor Sloane.
From Grainne, Aberdeen, via text on 81111: "Can I send loads of love to Tim Henman? Really enjoying his commentary and punditry. He and Mac are a great double act!"
I'll get the Mole to pass on that sentiment
I'll get the Mole to pass on that sentiment
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1151: Talk of this Curse of Cheese continues... You'll be pleased to know I visited a witch doctor yesterday, who prescribed sitting in the sunshine and drinking Pimms. This, I'm confident, will have banished the curse. Also, was I anywhere near Laura Robson when she succumbed yesterday? No.
BBC Sport's Chris Bevan was though...
1148: Time for a bit of exercise... manually refresh for the magic of moving pictures (in the UK).
1141: Poor 'anon' (although sympathy is tempered by failure to put name on text, grrrr). Look, I like A-Rod too. What's not to like? But just imagine Andy Murray, a British player, indeed the best British player in all of our lifetimes (unless you happen to have witnessed Fred Perry play), lifting that golden trophy on Sunday. It could happen...
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1137: Early-morning peace of Commentary Box Four has been shattered by an argument about how to pronounce Was Not Was, who did a cover of Papa Was A Rolling Stone. Difficult to explain in text though so I'll move on...
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1125: Thanks Mark for asking about Cheesy's Outside Court Golden Ticket, coming soon to Wikipedia. Crikey, it's tricky today. I'm going for two - hey, it's my game, my rules. First, you'll head to Court Three to see not one, not two, but three former Wimbledon champions in the shape of Conchita Martinez, Martina Navratilova and Jo Durie in veteran doubles action. Then you'll sneak your way onto Court One for a mixed doubles match, the winner of which will face Jamie Murray and Liezel Huber in the semis.
1121: Interesting excuse from Ivo Karlovic yesterday after the big-server was broken in only his second service game against the mighty Roger Federer. "It was also a little bit problem with the sun was in my eyes. So, yeah, it was that." Used that one myself Ivo, along with "I was a bit hungry" and "There were some leaves on the court". Big Ivo can console himself with his two-film deal: Dr Ivo And The Ace Machine, with the follow-up There Will Be Tie-Breaks.
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1114: About five texts so far on 81111 and two of them are asking what time Andy Murray will be on tomorrow. Do I look like Wimbledon's order of play committee? Do I? Saying that, I'd be surprised, shocked even, if Murray-Roddick wasn't second on tomorrow. We Brits like Murray to be on late, while American audiences also prefer their players on later so they don't have to get up in the middle of the night to watch. The lazy so-and-sos.
1109: Bates and Jarryd are up third on Court Two today, facing everyone's favourite doubles-pairing-with-similar-sounding-names Peter McNamara and Paul McNamee. I don't envy the umpire - or indeed the scoreboard - in the Farquharson/Sterland-Markovic clash. The Brits are up against Alexandros-Fernandinos Georgoudas and Andrei Vasilevski on Court Four. I feel tired just typing that.
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1105: This late start leaves me with so many things to talk about and yet so little time... The women's semi-finals are obviously top of the list. Then there's magical Murray, flawless Fed, rampant Roddick and, er, Haas. And what about Jeremy 'Jezza' Bates?
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1100: Hello there. We've given you a couple of hours off the live text rollercoaster this morning. Too much excitement is bad for you.
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